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Golfer: Please stop checking your watch all the time, caddy. It's distracting!
Caddy: This isn't a watch, sir, its a compass!
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Joined:  03 Sep 2003
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Location:  Winchcombe
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Occupation:  Retired
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Golfer: Well, I have never played this badly before! Caddy: I didn't realize you had played before, sir.